You ever have those days where you feel like you really do understand what was eating Gilbert Grape? I do. Actually the last several weeks have been plague with concern after concern about my surroundings, this world I live in, my life and wellbeing and that of others too.
So I’m clear let me put out this disclaimer. I am not complaining. I am however very grateful for my life, the spirit I’ve been given, and the time I have here to share. So please don’t hit me with the “you should be grateful” speech or the “well at least you have this or that” speech. I am well aware of how blessed I am to have a pulse this morning.
But some things are really bothering me.
Over the last several weeks, several people that I know have gone on to be with the Lord, and one friend’s son went home to be with Jesus. Seeing the people I care for dealing with grief and the loss of their loved ones make me stop and take stock. I’m hoping that my prayers though genuine and from my heart help in some small way to bring comfort.
The A.M. and P.M. news give us plenty to be concerned about; the social injustices, the racial discriminations, U.S. Supreme Court decisions; these tensions tend to wear even the best activist thin on good days. The pot is past brewing, it’s boiling over.
My family is expecting grandchild number 3. Expected arrival is in about 2 ½ months. I shudder to think what my grandbabies will have to look forward to by the time they are age 30. They should be looking at it as a milestone that represents new beginnings. They should have enjoyed their “extended adolescences” by this time. But will they? I just don’t know.
Serious illnesses and disease has stricken a member of my family. I know because I believe that total victory and complete healing and restoration is coming. Without a doubt he will be healed, but it happened. Many can, will and do say that this was a type illness mainly due to a form of self-destruction; however if this is true, it really bothers me because what does the mind of a person who has self-destructive behavior look like? Does it look like the face of my love one? No, because I recognize him when I look at him. He looks the same he always has to me with the exception of the aging process. So am I absorbed and oblivious to the passage of time, or am I choosing to not see and accept what’s really going on?
So much I tell you. Is really bothering me.